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Otaba Dorcas

How To Be A Successful Career Woman

By | General | 7 Comments

How To Be A Successful Career Woman.


Just recently women have being focused on their career, women voices can be heard, they can have great ambitions, and more values to offer to the society. So, it is no surprise that women are elected_and_appointed_female_heads_of_state_and in to the_government.

Nevertheless, every woman has a different definition of success, but to a certain percentage almost all women have same characteristics that makes them stand out as successful women.

Truth be told, there’s a similar trait all successful women possess, that is – they surround themselves with fellow ambitious and great career women.

I attended a women conference in Metropolitan hotel, Calabar. Nigeria,  last year, and “how to be a successful career woman” is one of the frequently asked questions. I could see the hunger of women who wished to do great things and change narratives.


How to be a successful career woman ( A woman in grey sweat shirt)

How to be a successful career woman ( A woman in grey sweat shirt)


So, here is a quick question for you “are you an aspiring career woman?
Was your answer to the question above “yes?

Then here are certain traits you should possess and nurture:

  • Develop Love And Passion For What You Do

Nobody becomes successful with hate and dissatisfaction for what they do, you may be skillful, you may put in your best into all you do, but success wouldn’t come to you completely.

Let’s assume you love and have passion for what you do, plus your drive and hard work will simply catapult you and your company ( or whatever it is that you do) to a greater level. You will always beam with smiles and joy each time you step out to do your work.

  • Do Not Expect Perfection

If you’ve being following my articles then you would be used to this point already, that is to tell you how important it is to not expect perfection from yourself.

Many bosses have ruined chances of getting great results because of their quest for excellent and perfect results.

People hopes and happiness have crashed because they never got expected produce, so they become frustrated and downtrodden and maybe it becomes difficult to try again.

Be it as it may, it is a nice thing to hope and work towards achieving the best but for you to be so bent in achieving perfection is a “No No” for me.
Success comes with knowing what is achievable and sticking to your benchmark too, it will really keep your mental health in check.


  • Be Your Own Boss

How do you measure success when you are not leading? Success entails setting rules for yourself or work towards hitting that promotion that will skyrocket you for success.

You will gain control of things around you – that’s what being your own boss means anyways, you will be balance and happy.

  • Believe In Yourself

It’s popularly said that ” your believing system is your becoming system” apparently it means you become what you believe in. So when you believe in yourself and the fact that you can be successful, it is an important way of achievement.

So no matter how crazy your ideas look to you now – (in fact if your ideas are not crazy then there aren’t worth it, sounds familiar? 😊) believe that you can achieve it and you can be heard also, Believe you can build your confidence level to achieving your goals.


How to be a successful career woman ( A woman in white sweat shirt)

How to be a successful career woman ( A woman in white sweat shirt)


  • Do Not Be Afraid To Take Risks


Let’s debunk that believe that women hate to take risk and risk taking is only for men.

This point is personal, I feel like I’m talking to myself too, most times I wonder how far I would have gone and how great my achievements would have been if I wasn’t afraid of anything, yes I know I took so many risks in the past that didn’t yield any expected results but we never know when our breakthrough for success will come.

So if you desire success maybe like me, you need not be afraid and of course treat every risk with caution.

  • Know That To Succeed, You Must Fail

This point can not be over emphasized, failure doesn’t mean you can’t rise and push on again, failure only teach you golden lessons that make you perform better the next time you try again.

Especially if you are trying an entirely new project, expect to fail, remember one of Thomas Edison’s quotes “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work” he still pressed on expecting to succeed.

  • Take Care Of Yourself

Successful women have this similar traits of looking good😊, they treat their health and body with high priority.

No one sees success in an unorganized person, try to exercise once in a while, it will help keep your body in check and help you release those bad energy you must have accumulated as a result of stress, rather than transferring aggression to people around you.

Exercise will do you a favor of releasing endorphins and unwanted vibes, it will make you look good, smart and happy.


How to be a successful career woman ( A woman alone and exercising)

How to be a successful career woman ( A woman alone and exercising)


  • Schedule Some Alone Time

We know you have domestic responsibilities (house work) and your other work to do, but how about your own need? You need to be refreshed, you need a lone time with yourself to think things through, it will help you harness your abilities even more, at least you can find out what you need to do well or even stop doing.

Go for vacations, treat yourself to a nice outing with no one, eat all you want and can, get a massage, and remember to do some research because all these joined together can really help your success growth.

  • Think Long-term

Remember you have goals and always think about them. Keep planning, evaluating, re-evaluating your long term goals at every point.

This will help you know which goals to be prioritized or dropped for new and important goals to be fixed in your plan.

It is also important that you have all your day schedule figured out, so you don’t have to spend a reasonable time of your day playing around rather than going for your goal.

  • Take action

Many people know what they want, but that’s not enough, you have to go for it. You won’t achieve success if you don’t take some steps towards achieving your goals.

This entails knowing what achieving your goals will demand and how your career can grow.

Do you need to attend specific seminars or take some few courses to move you to success? Then it’s time for you to take action.

How do your mentors handle similar issues like yours? what strategies do they employ? It’s high time you started your own strategies too.


Success comes with a price, you gotta pay before you can access the goldmine


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READ ALSO: 10-bad-habits-you-need-to-quit-right-now


Ways to value yourself as a Woman

By | General | 3 Comments

Ways to value yourself as a Woman.


Last year was funny and difficult for me. I had a lot going on with me that affected my mental health. From depression to anxiety.

Looking around to other successful and beautiful women of my age, I couldn’t help but imagine.

I was inquisitive, wanted to know more, I wanted to share with other women who like me, wanted to pull out from their depression and be happy just as every woman needs to – So I started compiling a resource you can use too.

I interviewed some close women I knew, I asked them questions like ” what are your mantras and tips of attaining self-love and care?
Part of their responses plus my practices joined together is contained in these 11 recipes of valuing yourself as a Woman.


Ways to value yourself as a Woman ( woman with self love)

Ways to value yourself as a Woman ( woman with self love)

Ways to value yourself as a Woman

1. Stop comparing yourself to other women

Our society is competitive, so comparing yourself to other women is natural too. But guess what ‘it can be very dangerous’ your mental health will be affected by Inferiority_complex, you will spend so much time looking at how ahead other people are.

There is no point measuring up or comparing yourself to anyone, concentrate on you and your personal race, channel that energy to making yourself free.

2. Don’t worry about others opinions

The society has a way of ordering you and making you conform to her norm, please don’t worry about it.
People’s opinion will delay your journey to being your best.


3. Allow yourself to make mistakes

Mistakes are part of life, we all make mistakes. It is just unfortunate how all we aspire these days is how to get perfect, an action that must have cost you a lot, give yourself a break, relax and if you know the mistake is not going to affect you so much and it’s not too expensive, take a chill pill and let that mistake flow, mistakes don’t hinder or slow your growth, you will definitely reach your goal it’s just time.

So, ignore that silent voice in your head that always tell you to be perfect. Make lot of mistakes – lol!! You will learn golden lessons.


4. You are more valuable than you look

So, I got used to body shaming, it started feeling like a compliment, when people say “Dorcas, you are dry (thin) ” I smile ☺ and move.
This point is important, your looks got nothing to do with what you carry and can offer, don’t be distracted.

Be like me, stop agreeing to people’s judgement of your looks that you are inadequate. Your values lies in who you are and not how you look. So, move.

Wear what you are comfortable and confident in.
Most people like to wear so much makeup and clothes while some like to be simple, whatever category you fall, stick to it and be happy.


Ways to value yourself as a Woman ( woman with self love)

Ways to value yourself as a Woman ( woman with self love)


5. Don’t be afraid to let go of toxic people

Cut them off as soon as possible, those people who represent toxic vibe and they don’t look like they will change or regret their actions.
Stay away from them and don’t have any regrets about it, it’s important and also like a liberation, although some friends are hard to let go.

Tip: secure your vibe. You are not being rude or wrong to exonerate yourself from company of people who only drain you.

6. Process your fears

Fear is natural and human too, so accept your fears and understand them.
This step can really help you in dealing with your mental health, so you already know what your fears are, you can now gain authority because of the clarity you have and you will know the strategies to dealing with them.

So all forms of anxiety will be a thing of the past because you processed your fears.

7. Trust yourself to make good decisions for yourself

Trust your judgement and instincts first, and stop having doubt about your abilities to do things the right way. Your feelings are always valid, so, when you are thrown in a state of making an important decision let yours be among the options – because you can only want the best for yourself.

8. Grab life opportunities or create your own

Why are you still waiting? For the right time? I’m talking about taking that step towards your dream, are you waiting for the perfect opportunity?

Take that boldest step now and make use of any opportunity You See, and if there’s none, please create your own opportunity.
Stop waiting and start working, don’t let circumstances tie you down.


Ways to value yourself as a Woman ( woman with self love)

Ways to value yourself as a Woman ( woman with self love)

9. Put yourself first

Women are good at putting others first – this is wrong. Don’t feel like its unfair to put yourself first. In situations where you know you should be, try to think about yourself first, don’t let this affect your emotional and social well-being.

Find time and give yourself a treat, like me, I choose days to stay in bed almost throughout or go out alone to nice places. Discover what lightens you up and attend to it.

10. Exercise boldness in public

Learn the habit of speaking your mind. Be bold, try to exercise boldness as you speak in public.

When you join a group of people all sitting and you see an empty seat please sit without taking permission, join a conversation and always make sure your contributions are relevant.

Learn public speaking, practice and always know that your opinions are as important as everyone else.

11. Be kind to yourself

We are in a very harsh world where people criticize a lot – don’t join them.
Speak kind words to yourself, and don’t ever use mean words on yourself. Celebrate yourself both wins and losses.
Isn’t it obvious that you have come this far? Don’t wait for your birthday to tell yourself how wonderful a person you are.

Final Note

Do you see your achievements at all? Look at you, see how far you’ve come.
Cut yourself some slack and be patient.
Self-love and value will gradually happen only if you let it.
Soon, you will look back to this moment and see how they almost hindered your greatness.


So tell me, was this article helpful?

Have you ever had issues like me on how to give yourself prestige and love yourself? and how did you go about it?

Use the comment session and subscribe too. Your friends might need this article too, please share.

READ ALSO: ways-to-be-smarter-and-more-confident


10 bad habits you need to quit right now

By | General | 4 Comments


10 bad habits you need to quit right now

Putting up a productivity activity – a schedule that aids you maintain a peak level of high energy can make you get the best out of your days.

Planning your schedule can help you remove activities that can drain and prevent your progress and your bad habits are included.

Agree with me or not, bad habits are not good for you, they affect you mentally, emotionally, psychologically, physically and most times even socially. I understand that some bad habits can be very hard to quit compared to the ones you easily do away with, however, you still have to do away with them.


10 Habits You Need to quit right now ( a sad woman)

10 Habits You Need to quit right now ( a sad woman)

Here are 10 bad habits you need to quit right now:

1. Nail Biting

Nail biting is unhygienic — that is a proven fact, but it can affect your social life, result to dental problems, of course it can also cause stomach upset because of the unhygienic substance you take inside, your finger nails will get deformed on the long run.

As you bite your nails, they tend to get shorter, your nail plates also experience scarring and may result to absence of nail plates.

Discover what triggers your nail biting habit and try to replace it with some positive habit.

2. Hanging out with Naysayers

We know these people — people who are devil incarnate to every goal and idea you want to go for. We have a mind of our own that criticize us first, so it becomes worst when you have someone around you who is always ready to disagree with your plans and talk it down.
Never hang out with these naysayers and spend more time with supportive and positive people who share constructive feedback and give you a sense of belonging instead. You will find more joy this way.

3. Smoking

Smoking is one of the causes of death that can be prevented globally.
In just Nigeria alone, about 300,000 deaths are attributed to smoking related disease
In Nigeria, about 300,000 deaths are attributed to smoking related diseases on an annual basis.

According to World Health Organisation- Smokers die younger, smoking also causes premature skin aging ( wrinkling on a young persons skin). Bad breath, yellow skin and you expose your loved ones who are close to you to some of these smoke related diseases because they are passive smokers who inhale the smoke indirectly.

4. Excessive Drinking

All of us know drinking excess alcohol is bad for us, but do you know the harm that can be caused?

According to the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism, drinking too much, be it regularly or occasionally, can seriously cause harm to your health.

If drinking is part of your addictions, cutting off completely at once can be tasking, you can cut it down to the number of glasses you take each time you drink in a week.

5.Eating Junk Food

Junk food are everywhere in our today society. From Mr Biggs to KFC, to Spa to 24/7 takeouts, junk food which include fries, highly processed sausage and burgers and sodas has become a norm in our society today.

I know you will say, “Hello, can’t you see junk food is tasty!”, think again:
Study shows that the excessive consumption of junk food alters or slows down the activities in the brain by a way that looks similar to drug addiction like Marijuana and heroin.

It may not be possible to completely remove junk food immediately from our diet but you can try reducing the junk food today, just as Oyindamola, my friend did Instead of caffeinated drinks, you can try fresh fruit juice that is neither Carbonated nor preserved.

Replace fries with mashed potato, a salad, or rice (They are food outlets that sells this stuffs). Eat roasted or grilled meat instead of fried.

6. Eating Too Much Red Meat

Red meat is harmful, it causes more harm to your healthy organs, there are evidence that excess consumption of red meat increases susceptibility to Oesophageal cancer, lung cancer and colorectal cancer .
Do watch out and limit your intake of red meat— better still, don’t eat red meat at all. ”

7. Watching Too Much TV

Brian Tracy in his book “Eat that frog” said he has never regretted not watching TV for over two decades now because that decision boost productivity.

You can watch TV if you want, especially well scripted dramas and news which can be a nice way to relax but always know that TV isn’t your world and can be considered as a bad habit too.
Using three hours everyday watching TV will not produce any positive change, you can use that time to read good books, reflect, meditate and take actions on great ideas.

8. Being Late

Are you aware that being late is being rude to other people? Lol!! It also means you are not steady, struggling to catch up with your agenda, and of course you must always apologize to everyone you meet- that feeling sucks right?

Decease from lateness and you should not be punctual too, instead why not be early. Plan to arrive 20 minutes earlier before any appointments or meetings, bring with you what will engage you for the 20 minutes while you wait. Then you can stop living a rushy life and always trying to meet up.

10 Habits You Need to quit right now ( a woman running late for an appointment) )

10 Habits You Need to quit right now ( a disorganized woman)

9. Leaving Things to the Last Minute

Burning midnight candles in a rush is wrong.
Those of you who wait till die-minutes before submitting school work in colleges will know it is not fun at all. Not only is it harmful to your health, it can also be exhausting as you are always hyper-tensed, feeling scared whether you can finish the work on time or not.

Rather than waiting for deadlines, why not start today?, Be agile about your goals and always remember to plan ahead, taking note of what needs to be done within a specific period and getting them done on time or even in advance.

10. Focusing on the Negatives

Life always present us with two sides of a coin, always remember that as much as you have the negative side of a phase, there are also areas that are going smoothly.

Although it is always easy to focus on the negative but it doesn’t even inspire or encourage us, you know how important the end product of your goal is, so why dwell so much on the negatives that will soon fade.


Here, you find the 10 most common bad habits and their consequences on your mind and body. The exciting news is that you can quit them all it’s just a matter of time and commitment.

Your bad habits might not be listed here, but my suggestion works for any habit, if you want to quit them? then you gotta try, then you will find life more beautiful

I know this article was helpful
Tell me what you think, how long have you tried to quit a stubborn habit?
Was your try successful? use the comment session and share the article with your friends and loved ones as well.

See you around

Read Also: ways-to-be-smarter-and-more-confident



I’m single at 28 what do I do?

By | General | 5 Comments

I’m single at 28 what do i do?

Break ups at 28 always sounds weird

I personally think there’s something spectacular about break-ups that happens at 28 years and above, lol.

You will have between coping with emotional trauma and pressure from the feeling that your relationship should have ended how you planned, I know right.

Don’t worry about it, not all relationships lead to marriage, don’t worry about what people will say, we get that a lot right?

But now that most of your friends are getting married, facebook news feed crowded with pre-wedding and marriage photos, babies and family hangouts, it’s always normal to feel like you are lagging behind, it has a way of lighting what you don’t have.

“But why is this relationship thing not working for me?“I need to get married”

These are a few out of many things I hear regularly from 28- 30 something people who are maybe frustrated, sad and jealous because they are single. Like there’s a secret puzzle to be unravelled. So when we compare ourselves with others, don’t judge us.

Nevertheless, I’m going to share with you what I think is the best answer to the question “I’m single at 28, what do I do?

1. It is alright to want someone to spend your life with. So being single can be a perfect opportunity to know what you really want from someone, you will know how to avoid settling down just for the reason of wanting a partner.

Being single comes with the temptation of settling with “Hell no” partners just because you needed to settle down, so instead of taking a decision based on what I lack, it can give me a different foresight on the whole dating and finding the right partner stuff.

Now I have the option of settling with anyone that comes my way and be ready for another breakup or take a wise and better decision to chill.

Good thing is, being single is an underrated freedom, you have all the super power to relax and find out what you want from a relationship, you have the freedom to show off the whole vibe you are made of, you can see friends, travel, hang out, attend parties, go for dates or you can focus on your work completely which of course will give you tremendous results.
Freedom to do whatever you wanna do.

I'm single at 28 what do I do? (A woman brooding)

I’m single at 28 what do I do? (A woman brooding)


2. Your goal on relationship is to find a partner to spend your life with, perfect!!

But brooding over the fact that you are out-rightly single at this age is totally wrong, and you might not get engaged anytime soon at least not with the right person.

Your moping will trigger an energy that will be desperate, the ” I want it now” signal, you will only find yourself settling for less or wrong people ( that is the right word -wrong).

Actually, you have a few choices to make. Accept where you are and all the opportunities that comes with it. Develop yourself. Discover what caused your break-ups in the past, what were your wrongs? and work on them. Work on being the person you want to be in your future relationship. Go for something, Work for yourself.

Do new things, visit new and great places, look good, try to be bold in whatever you do. You never can tell who you might meet or the opportunities that awaits you.

Hang out more with your friends who are single, avoid your coupled friends (most of them will ruin your happiness with the fantasies of their homes).
More importantly, just be around people who make you feel good and excited or at least enthusiastic about life.

I'm single at 28 what do I do? (A woman depressed) )

I’m single at 28 what do I do? (A woman depressed) )


3. Dwell. It’s great you are feeling that way. It’s important because it can reveal some harsh, bitter and cold truths that might need to be attended to. But that’s no reason to dwell overload, it can be a trigger of anxiety.

If you are still single and not happy about it, well, that’s fine. It shows you know what you want. But don’t waste so much time moping over it. Fun, love, romance, friendship, excitement – all these are out there, if you can open the eyes of your understanding, accept where and who you are, the relationship will certainly come.


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